[LUGargano] Euphemism & Reality ..

[Mauro LISANTI]

We thrive on euphemism.  We call multi-megaton bombs "Peace-keepers", closet
size apartments "efficient" and incomprehensible artworks "innovative".  In
fact, "euphemism" has become a euphemism for "bald-faced lie".  And now, 
here
are the euphemisms so colorfully employed in Personal Ads:

EUPHEMISM                       REALITY
-------------------             -------------------------
Independent thinker             Crazy
High spirited                   Crazy and hyperactive
Free spirited                   Crazy and irresponsible
Outrageous                      Crazy and obnoxious
Exotic                          Crazy with a pierced nose/nipple
Cuddly                          Overweight
Huggable/Zaftig/Rubenesque      Fat (there's a lot to love)
Big and beautiful               Really Fat
Fat 'n' sassy                   Really Fat and loud
Svelte/Slender                  Anorexic
Dynamic                         Pushy
Assertive                       Pushy with a mean streak
Feisty/Ambitious                Would kill own mother for next corporate 
rung
Demanding                       Will make your life a living hell
Looking for Mr./Ms. Right       Looking for Mr./Ms. Rich